Friday, May 01, 2015

Preparing for the Journey: Cambodia!

I'm thrilled to have a guest writer today - my oldest daughter, Melynda.  Yours truly, Proud Moma

The preparation for the journey is a journey in itself. In preparing for my trip to Cambodia with my college's Juniors Global Program I have experienced many pre-journey joys and jitters. Now, I don’t know where to begin articulating the whirlwind of emotions that I feel before leaving in LESS THAN A WEEK!!!!!! So we will start with some pre-journey jitters.  

There have been a few times during the last few months that I have asked God what He was up to. I would get frustrated and scared and anxious. I had initially applied for a trip to Kenya and was shocked and a bit unsettled when the Juniors Global committee selected me for the Cambodia team. I had wanted to go to Africa since I was a child, how could that not be the trip that God wanted me on? Apparently, God had given the committee a different message and after many hours of prayer and seeking my mother’s counsel, I was able to see and accept God’s calling. I later had trouble finding and then later ordering a copy of my birth certificate to apply for my passport. Then, my passport was taking an extremely long time to come which was putting off the purchase of our tickets. Another pre-journey “jitter” was my faith. I have been feeling a bit numb to the presence of God lately. Now, I know that I love the Lord and that he loves me but I noticed that I have not done a good job investing in that relationship with Him. Knowing this about myself made me question if I should go on this trip. Am I going for the right reasons? Are my intentions honorable and in the right place? Will I do any good? Am I going for the Cambodians or am I going for myself? I do not have the answers to these questions right now, and I think that is okay, because God has continued to give me a peace about going on this trip and subtly confirms this immediate calling on my life. This leads me into my pre-journey joys. 

Now, one of my pre-journey joys thus far is that I have been more intentional in seeking out the Lord and His will for this trip. I have spent time with Him in conversation about my expectations for this trip and how He will use it in my life. God has made it clear to me that I will be changed when I return from this trip. The scary thing is that I do not know how that change will look or manifest itself in my life. The thought of this change is equally exciting, scary, and intimidating, all at once. Other pre-journey joys are the resolution of my previously stated pre-journey jitters. All of those little obstacles that arose and made me question this calling, have not only been resolved but they have turned into a confirmation of the calling. In my prayer time over this trip I have had a growing excitement- knowing that this trip will be an amazing adventure. 

My prayer for this trip is that this will be a turning point in my life. I pray that I will be able to re-ignite the fire inside of me that burns for the Lord. I want to come back refined and changed. I want a renewed passion- I crave to be so close to God that others can’t help but to be drawn to Him when they are around me. I know that I am going to be exposed to things that I have never experienced before and I know that there will be hard days. I also know that no matter what happens on this trip- God will be my support through it all and I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me in Cambodia.  
With Love, 

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