Discombrugleated

My baby doesn't need me anymore. He's so unlike his older brother in many ways but in this way, they are WAY different. When he turned a year old, I lamented how different he already was from his brother. ( http://mamacitalujan.blogspot.com/2008/03/my-baby-is-1.html) My baby weaned himself at 16 months by one day shaking his head and refusing to nurse. He never nursed again. I was not prepared. I mourned. It was awful for me. He sucks his fingers. And has a favorite blanket. And sleeps in his own bed. His older brother had me... and my bed. And was forced to wean at 2 1/2 years old and it was awful for both of us. We mourned. We cried. We went through it together. I didn't know what I was wishing for when I wished for this: http://mamacitalujan.blogspot.com/2007/11/1-year-ago-now.html.

Okay, enough lamenting. Here is my baby, 4 1/2 years old, still not needing his mommy. He's in preschool now, 3 days a week and he loves it! He's such a character, check him out on his first day of school:
He could NOT stop laughing! We're talking belly laugh here people!

And what's really funny, is he was cracking himself up! I was trying to get a good picture here and the more I wanted him to "smile nicely for moma" he did this:Until I finally went to sport mode and got this out of him:

While the smile is what I wanted, looking back at these pictures, the crack up ones are my boy! They are HIM! And oh, how I lovew him and really don't want him to change... at all.

So, why the Discombrugleated post title? That is how I feel. I'm in an weird space mentally and emotionally. While he's not in school full time, he'd like to be. He's never ready to leave when I pick him up, looks forward to going to school each morning and is sad when it's not a school day.

When I was canning up a storm, I welcomed the break to get things done. Well, I'm done canning for the year.

My parents are in South America and I miss them terribly.

I don't have a quilt going. I want my sewing room so I can have a place that is "my space."

I miss having my baby around bugging me.

The chickens are fine. The garden is done and the chickens are enjoying gleaning it.

I miss my parents.

Fall is here and I want to get quilting. I need to get quilting!

Thankfully, Bible Study has begun and that is helping a great deal with me centering in on Jesus.

I'm fine. Really, I am. I just feel a little out of sorts and need to work the bugs out.